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Dear Dr Genevieve,

That’s quite a list of red flags it’s helpful to see all the different signs and symptoms of perfectionism.

Recently I’ve been putting some time onto the guitar; it can be a real pleasure when a composition comes together and begins to flow, you get a satisfying feeling of accomplishment and it can be the closest thing to pure joy when you connect with your instrument and perfectionism doesn’t stymie the process.

However I have self-doubts particularly when I compare myself with my friends who are exceptional and get paid for their art, I know that if I put them on a pedestal they will look down on me and I will look down on myself.

I have noticed aiming for perfection can kill the creative muse and result in resistance and procrastination the cycle of stagnation can last indefinitely.

The best bit of wisdom I recently heard is from Dr Rick Hanson who writes one should “aspire without attachments” I interpret this as meaning pour your love into your projects but don’t get stuck in the 'being successful narrative' which is out of anyones control. This eastern concept of having no attachments is no doubt one of the keys to our wellbeing.

I suppose on the plus side being a perfectionist means that what we do is likely to be of value. I think HSPs should remind each other we are fine where we are, but we can continue to develop.

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