HSP retreat update: There are still some places left of the retreat that Jules De Vitto and I are co-hosting next month at the sublime Quadrangle in Kent, UK (June 15-18). We’re very excited to be convening an in-person gathering, and have some very special guests for what’s shaping up to be a fantastic few days. For more details, please click here:
In last week’s newsletter, we talked about the importance of grounding, and I offered a few ideas for how you can use earth and water to help bring yourself back into balance.
Here are some suggestions for how fire and air can also help you to ground:
Sitting By Fire
I find sitting around a fire is one of the most grounding experiences imaginable — bringing me immediately into the present moment, and helping me inhabit my body more fully.
A fire brings me home to myself, connecting me to something deeply primal and ancestral.
In south-west London, I don’t have much access to fires, sadly. But on the retreat Jules De Vitto and I are co-hosting next month there is a fire pit, so there will be plenty of opportunities to gather round and enjoy the flickering flames.
For years, I attended a sweat lodge ceremony in Oxfordshire, which I still consider to be one of the most powerful healing practices I’ve experienced. (You can hear Matthew discussing the power of sweat lodge ceremonies with our friend Dallas Gudgell, a Dakota ceremony leader in Boise, Idaho, on this podcast).
And you don’t need a fire to evoke fiery energy. Try:
Dancing or singing to bring fire into your belly
Cooking nourishing, warm, grounding food
Lighting candles (You can get buy battery-powered candles with a surprisingly realistic flicker that create a very cosy atmosphere — and don’t pose a fire risk!)
Working With Air
When the weather’s fine, there can be something very grounding about opening your doors and windows and letting as much fresh air as possible into your home — and if there’s a gentle breeze blowing, so much the better.
Conscious breathing is a core grounding practice. The simple act of noticing how we’re breathing — without attempting any special technique, or even to change it in any way — immediately helps us to become more present, and aware of our body.
If you’re feeling like you want to drop more deeply into yourself, then inhale for the count of four, and exhale for the count of seven — focusing on the exhale. Practicing this rhythm for a minute or two will immediately help to regulate your system.
I also love these breathing tips from Charlie Morley, author of Wake Up To Sleep, who The HSP Revolution interviewed last year. Here’s what Charlie told us:
“The quickest way to change your neurological state is through the breath. Over millions of years of evolution, the brain has come to prioritise messages from the lungs above all others — because if the lungs stop functioning, we’re going to die really, really quickly.
“Most of us are breathing at about 15-20 breaths a minute — that’s actually incredibly fast. The average American breath rate in 1939 was 4.5 breaths a minute — that’s 75 percent slower than we breathe today. Even as recently as the 1980s, it was still 7.5 breaths a minute.
“So what happened in the last 40 years to more than double the average breath rate? We’ve also seen double the amount of anxiety and depression and obesity, and certain forms of strokes. Perhaps it’s all linked? Absolutely.
“Any time we’re breathing at more than 10 breaths a minute we’re in a mild state of what’s called “sympathetic dominance” — which means the accelerator pedal on the car of our internal engine is being pressed. But at the same time, we’ve got the hand-brake on because we’re just sitting at our laptop.
“Think what that would do to a car: It would wear out the battery, wear down the brake pads. It would be really bad for the body — and it turns out, it is. Simply because of the way we breathe, many of us are in a chronic state of low-level anxiety or fight-or-flight. That can get worse when you bring high sensitivity, or high levels of stress and trauma, into the mix.
“The easiest way to regulate the autonomic nervous system before you go to bed is to do 20 minutes of slow, deep breathing, where you’re taking five breaths a minute —which is very slow compared to the usual 15-20 breaths a minute.
“How do we slow the breath down to that speed? We can use a time tracker — on my website there are loads of free downloads of these breath tracks.
“If you do 20 minutes of that before bed, the effect on the nervous system will last about 2-3 hours. You’re now in perfect autonomic balance; you’ve moved out of sympathetic dominance; you’re now in the relaxation state where you won’t need to do all the sleep hygiene tips, and sleep can happen naturally.”
I find it amazing that just 20 minutes of slower breathing can make all the difference to your night’s sleep.
And if you’re looking for some relaxing music as you practice, here are a couple of tracks I love:
Mantras in Love — Beautiful Chorus
Breath Of Life — Susie Ro and Ayla